Author: Christine Wyrtzen

CHALLENGING LOYALTY TO FAMILY FOR GOD’S SAKE

         So Jacob sent and called Rachel and Leah into the field where his flock was and said to them, “I see that your father does not regard me with favor as he did before. But the God of my father has been with me. You know that I have served your father with all my strength, yet your father has cheated me and changed my wages ten times. Genesis 31:4-7

         How many marriages implode because couples can’t talk honestly about their parents? It’s hard to ‘leave and cleave’. Childhoods are sacred unless there has been unhappiness we’re anxious to leave behind.

         Jacob has tough news to tell his wives. Their father has cheated him 10x his wages. Will they be defensive? And when Jacob tells them it’s time to leave home and everything familiar and head for Canaan, a foreign land, how will they respond?

         There comes a point in every person’s life when God calls us to see the truth about our family. I am to embrace the good, acknowledge the bad, and cling to God for grace as I grieve and make different choices. I am to love God more than my ancestors and love truth more than I love the ‘family way of doing things’. If everybody did this, it would be easier but only a minority face the truth of their families and are willing to live as God’s son or daughter. They risk being the only one in their families who are willing to be sanctified, ‘set apart’, from everyone else.

         There is an unwise way to talk to our spouses about their parents. It’s when past hurts affect my tone.  Legitimate complaints are disregarded because my words are vicious. Every conversation that exposes ungodliness in family needs a lot of prayer beforehand. You know the truth of the phrase, ‘Blood is thicker than water.’ It’s hard to hear someone else, even a spouse, talk about my parents and siblings and not immediately think, ‘How dare you!’

         Rachel and Leah heard Jacob’s account of Laban’s treacherous ways. They believed him and were able to see the truth of their father’s weaknesses. Few scriptures are more well known that this one. “You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free.” Never is this more true than when I see my family as God sees them. When I embrace the truth of my origins, endless spiritual possibilities open up before me.

How long it took for me to see the faults of the family I love; even longer to see my own faults. Thank you for not giving up and continuing to bring the truth before my eyes. Amen

Journal Question: Is there something you’ve been unwilling to acknowledge about your family? Has another family member been trying to talk to you about it? Ask God to show you what following Him means. Would you be willing today to be ‘open’ to the truth?   Tell God why or why not.

WHEN PRETENSES ARE REVEALED

Thus [Jacob] increased greatly and had large flocks, female servants and male servants, and camels and donkeys. Now Jacob heard that the sons of Laban were saying, “Jacob has taken all that was our father’s, and from what was our father’s he has gained all this wealth.” And Jacob saw that Laban did not regard him with favor as before. Then the Lord said to Jacob, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your kindred, and I will be with you.” Genesis 31:1-3

               Laban set up Jacob to fail. He stole some of his spotted and striped animals and hid them with his own son’s flocks in order to mate them. He would then accuse Jacob of stealing. When God prospered Jacob anyway, all pretenses of love and friendship Laban had exhibited, dissolved. No longer able to hide his true feelings, he accused Jacob and things became adversarial.

               At that point, God did not instruct Jacob on how to repair the relationship. He was told to leave and return to the land of his father. He was released with God’s blessing.

               Time in Laban’s household was a spiritual school. Jacob’s past sins were paid for and he bore up well under discipline. He gave his conniving father-in-law every opportunity to prosper and to embrace Yahweh. In the end, motives that Laban had hidden rose to the surface. What had stayed veiled for over a decade was exposed when issues of greed, Laban’s stronghold, pushed him to the limit. It was clear that Laban was not going to change so God released Jacob to leave.

               There are relationships that are tolerable for a while, sometimes a long while. Others perceive harmony but you know that beneath the surface, you are dealing with an adversary, not a friend.   You may be in ministry with this person, or work for him. God has not released you to leave and you are straining under the pretense. Jacob’s story is a firsthand illustration that if we do what is right and bear up well under the pressure of unfairness, there will be a graduation day. Some issue will cause everything to blow up. What is hidden now will become clear for all to see and God will use their sin to release us to our next appointment.

               For now, it can seem like you’re trapped. There is no such thing as ‘trapped’ in God’s purposes. Things might be uncomfortable, even excruciating. Your pride may be assaulted daily. Your coping ability might be pushed to the limits. Cling to God and allow this to strengthen your spiritual muscles of faith. One grand morning, God may just say, “Well done! Move on!”

I lived in oppression. It seemed endless. You taught me so much about my adversary and about myself. I remember the party our family threw when you said, “Move!” Oh Lord, You are a Deliverer! Amen

Journal Question: Make a list of 5 things you are learning in your Egypt. Can you appreciate the beauty of such wisdom?   Tell God what you need to persevere.

RESENTING THOSE WHO ARE BLESSED

Laban said, “Good! Let it be as you have said.” [But] he set a three days’ journey between himself and Jacob and Jacob pastured the rest of Laban’s flock. Genesis 30:34,36

         Laban’s view of Jacob was very limited. He did not know the struggles of the first three decades of Jacob’s life. All he saw was the blessing of God on Jacob those seven years. Everything Jacob touched prospered. So when Jacob offered to take the least amount of the flocks (the striped, spotted, and black), and only count those and their offspring as his, it sounded like a great deal to Laban but misgivings set in. Though Laban clearly had the advantage on paper, he had seen God’s blessing on Jacob firsthand. He knew that, somehow, Jacob would prosper. Scheming ensued to make sure Jacob would be the disadvantaged in the deal.

I can look at the life of someone God blesses and witness firsthand how God takes whatever little they have in their hands to continually produce abundance. I can privately hate them for it. I find little ways to steal from them, even if it’s their reputation. I delight in finding flaws in their character, in their family, and relish telling others that they’re not so perfect. Such is the bent of my flesh without God.

Laban’s issue was with God, not with Jacob. If he felt forgotten and second-rate, this was not Jacob’s doing. Since Laban didn’t even acknowledge Yahweh, he had no way to cope spiritually except to take matters in his own hands.

This past Sunday, I was visiting a church where there had been a divine healing of a young man’s cancer. After praying, the tumor was just gone. The congregation was invited to praise out loud. Next to me was a dear friend who has survived brain, and breast, cancer. Healing prayers were prayed for her too but God did not do for her exactly what he did for this young man. Though she clapped and celebrated his good news, I wondered if there was a brief struggle in her soul though she is in remission.

If you are in painful times today and your trust in God is shaken by another’s blessing, press through your anger to seek God. “Man is born unto trouble…” and looking at others lives through momentary lenses is dangerous. Good and bad times are allotted to us all.

Help my unbelief. I have often despaired that your ‘plans for others were good’ — but I was excluded. Time proved otherwise but help me trust you when I can NOT see. Amen

Journal Question: Do you envy another’s story? What must you do to be right with God? What beliefs are simmering in your anger?

“GO HOME!”

For you had little before I came, and it has increased abundantly, and the Lord has blessed you wherever I turned. But now when shall I provide for my own household also?” Genesis 30:30

         When you have a gift that greatly benefits others, it will be in high demand. It can feel as if the gift is both a blessing and a curse. It’s hard to tell who your real friends are. You’re popular, yes, but is it because of your gift or because of the person you are?

         Jacob had God’s blessing. Everything he touched of Laban’s prospered. It is no surprise that the gift Jacob gave of seven years of labor turned into a kind of slavery. Laban had no intention of letting Jacob go. At this point though, it was time to think about his own family’s provision. Their future was at stake.

         In the generation before me, this was the philosophy of ministry: Give everything to ministry and God will take care of your family. As a teenager, I got to personally witness ministry families. Fathers would take off for weeks, sometime for months. Mothers raised the children. To this day, I see fallout from children who lived in a fatherless environment.

         It is easy to give your gift where it is appreciated. Ministry can be an aphrodisiac and all the while, family suffers. Is today the day when you should go home? You simply can’t ignore the needs at home any longer. It won’t be easy to put your family first. Initially, their anger will be center stage over your absence. Persevere. Humbly ask for forgiveness and prove, with time, that you are sincere.

         I’ve been in ministry 38 years. For many of them, I’ve sung to packed auditoriums and known night after night of standing ovations. It was addicting but also necessary to turn down great invitations in exchange for being a wife and mother. Believe me, I haven’t always gotten it right. One night in Canada some years ago, God brought a woman to me who offered this prophetic word. “Go home and cultivate faithfulness.” The spirit of conviction burned through my soul. I made some course corrections.          Putting others before myself is always hard. I can resent them for needing me. What is the remedy?Letting God show me His will for my life and knowing that this is the way of blessing and peace. Ultimately, everything I do is for the glory of God and that often means saying no to the church and yes to a spouse or child.

Families are falling apart. The window of time to repair it is short. Show all of us who read this today how it applies. Amen

Journal Question: What would it mean for you to stand in Jacob’s place today and tell your ‘Laban’ that it’s time for you to take care of family?

DON’T GO!

 As soon as Rachel had borne Joseph, Jacob said to Laban, “Send me away, that I may go to my own home and country. But Laban said to him, “If I have found favor in your sight, I have learned by divination that the Lord has blessed me because of you. Name your wages, and I will give it.” Genesis 30:25,27-28

         God’s blessing over a group of people often comes with a person. A righteous mother or father brings God’s favor upon their household. Remove that person however, and things change. The glory of God leaves. Whatever spiritual veneer was there is removed and the true spirituality of the people who are left is revealed. God’s servant kept a lid on things by their very presence.

         Laban knew that God had blessed his family when Jacob arrived. The thought of Jacob leaving must have sent panic through Laban’s heart. What about the prosperity he enjoyed? Would it end? In most cases, it does.

         My mother died when I was thirty. She had always been a quiet strength in our home. She was also a presence of restraint. We loved her so deeply that we sat on inappropriate comments and angry outbursts. Her death, however, changed everything. The cancer of family dysfunction surfaced after she was gone. What was hidden by her very presence was revealed slowly over time. It became clear to me why God took her home.

         Have you heard people express their angst with God over why He appears to take the good people home and leaves the unrighteous to affect the earth? Perhaps you’ve said goodbye to a saint in your family. You believe they died before their time. Everything seemed to fall apart without them.

         As it should! God gives each person, and each family, a window of time to deal with their issues. Insight and understanding are theirs for a short time only. This is their chance to humbly deal with their sin, their past hurts, and draw near to God for forgiveness and change. If a person chooses spiritual blindness and rebellion, God often closes the door of opportunity and gives them over to a hardened heart in the area of their weaknesses. I’ve seen it over and over. Even in Christians.

         If someone with God’s favor is about to leave your home, don’t despair. God is about to bring light and opportunity to whomever is left. Spiritual needs will be exposed.

         If you are the righteous one about to leave people you care about; family, business, church, etc…. know that God will use your absence for their good. Pray for them. You’ve been a light but now it’s time to see if they will seek the Light without you.

Bring Your Spirit of revival to those without You today. Help them remember their legacy and repent. Amen

Journal Question: Can you recognize what God is doing in your family and in your life? If you gained insight from today’s devotional, write out what God has shown you while it’s fresh manna.

LIVING WITH DISGRACE

Then God remembered Rachel, and God listened to her and opened her womb. She conceived and bore a son and said, “God has taken away my reproach.” Genesis 30:22-23

         To be barren in Rachel’s culture was to live as one scorned. Barrenness was believed to be a curse and you were an embarrassment to your husband. This time of disgrace wasn’t a short season for Rachel. While she languished under her veil of shame, Leah, Jacob’s other wife, bore him six children. At one point Rachel turned to an aphrodisiac to boost fertility but that proved ineffective.

         Why do seasons of shame and disgrace often span a decade or two? They don’t usually last a year. God appears to be out of the picture completely –ignoring the oppressed. While none of us can know the full mind of God, the stories of those like Rachel, Sarah, Hannah, and Elizabeth give great clues as to God’s purposes. When a wilderness marks a large portion of someone’s life, is God in the process of redemption? The answer is always yes. Redemption of ‘what’ can only be discerned by the one oppressed.

         For Rachel, I believe it was for her to know that God was her miracle worker, her provider. Had she easily born Jacob children, she wouldn’t have given a second thought to things like faith and prayer. When she finally did give birth to Joseph, she credited the Lord, not the power of the mandrakes.

         I have known seasons of affliction. None of them were short. All taught me perseverance, the power of prayer, and the nature of the wilderness. While great spiritual things prevailed at the end, the beginnings and middle of these seasons were pretty ugly. I had no clue how to navigate the years.

         You may be living in an atmosphere of disgrace. Perhaps you are not the child your parents wanted and you are still shamed even though your parents are aged. Maybe you are the not the wife, or husband, your spouse really thinks you should be. Criticism is your daily companion. How do you survive the barrage of corrections and insults? God wants to change the heart of your scorner, and he does if they’re willing. Many, however, live and die without knowing how to love. Hear this! Your survival doesn’t depend on them. It depends on God at work in your own heart.

         Unless you cultivate a relationship with God that involves experience beyond Bible study, you will not be able to weather it well. You must know how to draw near to God in prayer, how to meditate to restore peace to your churning soul, and how to make Jesus your daily bread and living water. Living in the shelter of His wings so that His whispers are palpable is the only security against the barrage of comments coming from the other side of the room. God is your Lover and Sustainer.

I lift each person reading this up to You as a small child. Break through the fog of pain to bathe them in Your presence. Amen

Journal Question: The years can drag on and on when life is defined by disgrace. Can you entertain the thought that God wants to do something stunning in the midst of dark times? Tell him that you need His personal encouragement today. Be specific.

HOW DESPERATE AM I?

In the days of wheat harvest Reuben went and found mandrakes in the field and brought them to his mother Leah. Then Rachel said to Leah, “Please give me some of your son’s mandrakes.” But she said to her, “Is it a small matter that you have taken away my husband? Would you take away my son’s mandrakes also?” Genesis 30:14

         Is there someone near you who has everything you want? You’ve kept your distance because being near them is painful. Now, in what seems like a cruel joke, they have been blessed yet again with something that would be lifesaving to you but it’s in their hands, not yours. You consider swallowing your pride to beg.

         This is the story of Leah and Rachel. Leah has borne Jacob many sons. Rachel has none and this is agonizing for her. To add fuel to the fire, Leah’s son comes in from the field with mandrakes – a plant believed to have properties that cure barrenness. Rachel is willing to do anything at this point to have children – even if it means asking Leah for her son’s mandrakes.

         When I believe that my fate lies outside of God’s providence, I will set out to turn things in my favor. I will even assume any false posture of friendship to win over my enemy, the one whom I believe is the key to moving forward. This is where manipulation is born. If I ask him outright for what he has, he’ll laugh in my face. If I pretend to be his friend and come bearing compliments, he may succumb to flattery.

         Are you in a desperate place today because someone who has little heart for you possesses the very thing you need? Battling envy is hard enough but to think that I must be clever enough deceive him seems like climbing Mt. Everest. If I’m Rachel, what do I do?

         It is not up to my ingenuity to secure my future. The timing of my blessing and the length of my wilderness are in God’s hands. He has not forgotten me. Blessing is mine though it may appear non-existent.   When another has what I think I need, I must remember that God has what I need. When He gives it, there will be true celebration of His glory. When I force someone else to give it by prying his hands open, the party is hollow.

Every single thing I need, You have. If I don’t have it yet, I must deal with my desperation in prayer. If I distrust You, help me and give me grace to stay true. Amen

Journal Question: What plot have you conceived to carry out today that will turn things in your favor? Do you love God enough to abandon it? Will you cast all your cares on God and wait for His answer?

I’M EXPECTED TO DO SOMETHING I CAN’T!

When Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, she envied her sister. She said to Jacob, “Give me children, or I shall die!” Jacob’s anger was kindled against Rachel, and he said, “Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?” Genesis 30:1-2

         Jacob is in a tough spot. He has been tricked by Laban, the father of Rachel and Leah, his wives. The one he loves more is barren while the other has borne him three sons in order to win his favor. There is no part of this story that is working well for anyone. (Except for Laban who benefitted monetarily from Jacob’s work.)

         Rachel is pleading with him to do something about her barrenness. “Give me children, or I shall die!” Is there anything more tormenting than to be expected to provide something when you have no control over it? People look to others to give what is only supernaturally possible. The one who feels the pressure to play God is the one who can feel the most helpless.

         I’ve been put in the place of God more times than I can count. The one who demanded a solution was probably not aware that they were doing that. They were expressing their distress to someone who loved them but I carried their pain and wrung my hands over their plight.

         Are you between a rock and hard place today?For many years, I was unaware that I had the freedom to say ‘no’ to what was asked of me. As a performer, I agreed to do all that was expected. Most of it was asked with no regard of what was appropriate for the maturation level of a teenager or young adult. My self-talk sounded like this. “I have to do this ~ but I can’t! But I have to do this ~ but I can’t!” The torment escalated as performance time approached. When my name was announced, I flipped a switch, went out, and just did it. In my 30’s, I assessed the damage. If I had it to do over again, I would have revealed my limits.

         Are others looking to you to do what is humanly impossible? This is the perfect opportunity to make your relationship with them about prayer. There’s nothing more freeing than to say, “I can’t do what you’re asking but God can. Let’s stop and pray about it.” This does two things. 1.) It gives you a chance to say out loud that you’re human. And, 2.) It points them to the One who is the source. It trains them to look up and to pray for themselves. Your freedom from another’s demands requires your willingness to abdicate playing the part of God.

Praying with others, Lord, has given me my freedom but also the joy of bringing them to you for their miracle. And how You’ve loved them! Amen

Journal Question: Your freedom can begin today. What solution to someone’s problem are you feeling the pressure for? Make a plan to meet with them today, even by phone, to direct them to God. Write out your prayer ahead of time so you don’t lose your courage.

GOD EXALTS THE ONE OTHERS DESPISE

When the Lord saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. Genesis 29:31

         How Leah suffered when she was given to Jacob in marriage! She was allowed no vote in the decision. She was simply a pawn in her father’s greedy scheme. Yes, she got to become the wife to the husband her sister loved. That might seem like a victory but was it really? Think of the week of wedding feasts and festivities where everyone celebrated her marriage. Her husband was in mourning because he woke up to find her as his wife. To add to the agony, she will have to endure another week of wedding festivities when Jacob finally marries Rachel and truly rejoices. There will be no way to block out the sounds of this future celebration.

         “This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone.” Acts 4:11 God sees the ones others despise and he exalts them. The verse for today says that God ‘saw’ that Leah was hated. The word for ‘saw’ is the same word Scripture often uses before God intervenes for the oppressed. He ‘saw’ His people just before He liberated them from slavery. And how God blessed her. She gave birth to sons who would become the twelve tribes of Israel. And the most notable was Judah – whose greatest Son was Jesus Himself.

         Are you the least of your siblings? The least in the lineup of in-laws? The least remembered in your family’s inheritance?  Is there anyone who truly celebrates you? Or, do you feel tolerated, perhaps even invisible? Life can seem long and bitterness is always nipping at your heels. The idea that there could be joy is laughable ~ yet is that not the same ‘laugh’ that erupted out of Sarah after a lifetime of barrenness? God saw her, remembered her, and this divine affection made her heart burst for joy.

         God is the God of the underdog. If every Leah can live – learning to look up for her affection and blessing – she can know a joy that surpasses anything that people of this earth offer.

For every one who needs to know they are beautiful to You, show them today, Lord.

Journal Question: How does Leah’s story speak to your own story? Have you laid aside bitterness in exchange for the anticipation of God’s blessing? Will you open your heart to entertain the possibility that favor and joy can be yours?

WHEN I FEAR I’VE WASTED YEARS

And in the morning, behold, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?” Laban said, “It is not so done in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn. Genesis 29:25-26

         I don’t know if you have ever felt like Jacob or not. He fell in love with Rachel, asked her father Laban for her hand in marriage and was told that he could purchase her dowry for seven years of labor. There was no reason to doubt Laban’s word. He was family and seemed sincere.

         Jacob worked joyfully and anticipated the day he could marry Rachel. He expressed that the labor and effort he sustained for seven years were ‘as one day’ ~ so great was his love for his bride-to-be. Then the plot takes a sickening turn. Laban deceives Jacob. Underneath the wedding veil is not Rachel but her sister. He has been tricked and seven years of his life is gone. Is God the redeemer of lost years? That is the question.

         Have you ever signed up for something that would be of great cost to you – only to find out later that information was withheld? You might have made a different decision entirely. Some marry under false pretenses.Some make business decisions under a shroud of deception and lose everything. Some bare their soul to a confidant and later find out that the information has been used against them. These stories involve great losses, one of which is time.

         Jacob was forty when he went on his journey to meet Rachel. Hardly a young groom. To lose seven years must have seemed depressing but there is no indication that he plummets into despair. He loves Rachel enough to jump into another seven years of labor for the joy of finally having her as his wife.

         Hindsight into Jacob’s story offers us golden insight into the plans of God for people’s lives. His blessing on Jacob wasn’t thwarted in the least by Laban’s deception. When I’m the child of the great Redeemer, what seem to be lost years aren’t even a problem for God. When others sin against me and steal from me, it is spiritual futility to fall into bitterness. The energy and despair (and the strongholds that result) are really what’s wasted. Don’t I know the power of the One whose child I am? For three years, I despaired over 22 lost years, only to discover that they weren’t lost at all. They were teachers for the great redemption to come!

I’ve also learned that joy in You confounds and frustrates the one who sinned against me. Is there any greater victory and testimony? Amen

Journal Question: What losses are you counting today? Money, time, youth? Does it appear that your offender has won because of what was stolen? What does faith look like today? Would you stretch your spiritual eyesight to include a redemptive turn in your storyline?