Much has been said already about people who possess a heart of stone.  What hasn’t been explained is how stoney hearts are formed in the first place. 

Origins can go all the way back to pre-birth.  We know that babies feel things in the womb.  If he has heard his mother cry, contemplate abortion, and curse her circumstances, his view of himself and the world will be affected. Before he takes his first gasp of air, he already knows whether or not he is welcome.  Instead of eagerly reaching out to bond with his mother, or father, he will hide in some kind of shell.  He knows it is not safe to extend himself. 

If a small child lives in a violent home, or witnesses repeated episodes of violence outside the home, these cause him to draw into himself.  Trauma turns him inward.  Trauma freezes development.   Trauma isolates. 

Living with harsh criticism also creates stony hearts.  No child feels safe if he feels he can’t do anything right.  He walks on eggshells, always trying to conform to whatever image will earn him approval and peace.  He knows he can’t be himself, so he reigns in his thoughts and keeps conversations short.  He matures into someone who feels it’s risky to be authentic. 

The Gospel is beautiful to everyone who believes.  But for those who grew up hiding from others, even more so.  They realize that God loves them just as He created them and invites them to come out of the shadows, to shed the grave clothes and step into resurrection light.  They are welcomed through adoption.  Intimacy with the Father is risk-free.  A new child of God breathes deeply of kingdom oxygen and realizes there are no more reasons to walk on eggshells.  Perfect Love casts out fear.